Sticks and Stones...

May break my bones, but words will never hurt me. FALSE. For me, words can cut so deep and cause so much hurt. Here are a few recent examples…

“When you get stronger, you should exercise because you are a little fat.”
“You have fat legs.”
“You are big like an elephant.”

Y’all. Wow. I think one layer to this is that it’s hurtful. I am doing a study of James right now and it talks about the power of our words. “With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be.” – James 3: 9-10. In the incidences above I felt the power of someone’s words. My love language is words of affirmation, so I can definitely feel the power that words have to create or destroy. And I know that I have also used my words in harmful and hurtful ways, but usually mine come more in the form of talking behind someone’s back, venting, or gossiping. So I am guilty of this just as much as the next person.

But another layer is that it’s true. I want to blame or justify or focus on someone being hurtful, but y’all I am overweight. Now – let’s just have a second for the fact that I am NOT the size of an elephant, but that’s not the focus of why I’m actually hurt. Imagine the thing you are most insecure about, most embarrassed by, most frustrated by. Now imagine that someone voices that they notice that thing too. Immediately my confident façade crumbles and I literally fight back tears because it’s okay for me to dislike that part of myself and feel such insecurity about it, but now you’ve pointed out in a negative way that it’s obvious to you as well.

And do you know the really sad thing… there was a time (not long ago at all) that my response to that would have been to medicate those feelings through a milkshake or chips and salsa. But, in these recent incidences that was not how I responded because God is bigger and He is slowly but surely transforming my mind. Do you know what my first response was after I gathered myself and fought back tears – I talked to God about it. And let me tell you – that is rarely my first response to anything, but I want it to be. I took those words to Him and surrendered them to Him. Does it still hurt? Yep. Am I still insecure? Yes. But I am thankful for the refining process and how the Lord continues to reveal more of my own weakness so that I can boast all the more in His strength.

What words have been said to you that caused hurt? Have you talked to God about it? In my case, these were not words from close friends or family so I didn’t feel the need to confront the person, but maybe you do. Maybe there is hurt there for you that could easily turn into a root of bitterness. Don’t let that happen!

Also, let’s all consider how our words can hurt others and be careful and kind with our words.